Tag: cure diabetes

A Night In The Life Of a Type 1 Diabetic

I wrote this poem last night at 3 a.m. Seems like almost every night I am up at that time. Truth be told though I am not alone. Multitudes of others share a similar experience when caring for someone with this disease. If you know someone with Type 1 Diabetes and they are managing it so well know that there is a whole lot of hard work behind it.


A Night In The Life of a Type 1 Diabetic

By: Mary Williams

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray to God I catch some Zzz’s.
The first alarm goes off at 12
Time to make sure all is still well

A blood sugar reading of 65.
Time to down juice to keep her alive.
“Wake up sleepy head, it’s that time of night
Wake up so momma can make you alright.”

15 minutes later its time to re-poke
A drop of blood reveals its time for some Coke
Still too low to go to bed.
So we patiently wait to lay our weary heads.

15 minutes go by and the Alarm bell rings
Another drop of blood…141 it sings.
Set the alarm to wake up at 3.
My head hits the pillow and my alarm startles me.

Another drop of blood into the machine.
350 is what it now currently screams!
Freakity Frack!
I want our old lives back.

Time for a shot to bring them back down.
Set the alarm for 6 this time around.
My head hits the pillow its time for a snooze.
The alarm interrupts The Rock giving me booze,

On a nice sandy beach, enjoying a walk.
The alarms jolts me back to type 1 diabetes talk.
Another drop of blood says she needs to wake up.
65 again! This royally sucks.

night in the life of a type 1 diabetic

Time to down juice, we know the routine
I hate this disease, it makes me feel mean.
Another drop of blood is what I request
From small little hands that are trying their best

To be brave when the needles cause so much pain
Fingers riddled with scars is what has been gained
And now its time to start a brand new day,
With one step forward, there’s no other way.

Sleep is for the privileged and caffeine is on ice
A cure for type 1 diabetes sure would be nice.
To be rid of the burden that this disease brings
Would ease this mommy’s mind and end my baby’s suffering.


share a story

We Are Dying For a Cure

We Are Dying For a Cure

We Are Dying For a Cure

By: Eddy Murphy

 

I’ve fought off writing about diabetes in an honest and truthful way for almost fifteen years. I guess it’s taken me that long to come out of a state of denial, becoming more intimate with it than anything I’ve ever been passionate about.

Perhaps my shame is what has gotten the best of me. I never wanted to admit that, by default, I was weaker than everyone else around me. It has taken me this long to realize that I’m stronger than everyone I know.

I’ve hazily confronted death more than fifty times, waking up in a hospital more than once, or coming to my senses watching my mother wince in pain, holding her belly, saying I inadvertently punched her in the gut while in the throes of a hypoglycemic seizure.

We were both soaked in orange juice turning sticky, when whatever sugar made its way into my bloodstream, brought me back from the brink of death. And because of times like these, it has been hard for me to accept my worth as a human being.

I hate drawing insulin out of a syringe, knowing it could be my last.

I hate doing my necessary rituals of survival in front of my friends, backpacking through the mountains of my heart, because, in the moment, everything else is beautiful.

I just want to revel in the earth that is my home, and then I have to confront this ugly thing, grab it by the horns and tell it I’m not going anywhere. Not now. I’m going to live this moment.

There’s this superficial feeling I get, where I am validating myself by taking type 1 diabetes on, thirty miles from nowhere while experiencing the most beautiful places I have ever been. As if I’m doing things most other people are afraid to do, while being at the mercy of the whims of an overpriced drug that I have to love and hate simultaneously. It is a feat to come out of every trip into the mountains unscathed, deflecting a scythe with a smile.

Before, I would have life-altering lows to bring me out of my denial. I would only check my sugars 3 or so times a day, not catching highs until way beyond their reign. And seldom would I realize I was two glucose tabs away from death, getting closely reacquainted with diabetes when my hands began to seize and I couldn’t speak. Thankfully, circumstances have worked in my favor all these years. Someone was there, or I caught the tail end of consciousness before things went too far down.

Now, I’m a man. A man who feels his age and more. I love a woman with every flame left in my soul. I am grateful that someone accepts me for all my shortcomings; more importantly, I am grateful that someone appreciates the enormity of my life’s battle. What a human thing it is to love. It is the music of the human experience and I get to embrace it after all these years of not feeling human anymore.

Consequentially, I feel the need to revel in every moment I spend with this beautiful person. My life has been an imitation of the real thing for fifteen years until now. Love knows no diseases. Because of this, I am even more angrier now than ever before about the ugly greed of the pharmaceutical companies, the FDAs lackadaisical approach to pushing forward a potential cure/cure’s, and the ignorance of the general public to the suffering of 1.2 million people who have been stripped of a future.

I mean this in every sense. 1.2 million people in this country could die at any moment, yet ‘with proper management could live a happy and fulfilling life’.

Because of the requirement of insulin and the perpetuity of type 1 diabetes, it is a cash cow for large pharmaceutical companies and doctors across the country. And if my life ends in tragedy, I can be blamed by citing “improper management”. At least they got their bag of silver, and will still do so as long as this disease remains with a cure and profitable.

So for now, my wallet is being squeezed dry, and I’m being forced to be grateful for just being alive. I have no assets. I will never be able to afford the land in Montana I want. In truth, I am living in what would amount to Great Depression standards of living. And the public doesn’t know or care because the majority of the media attention is given to type 2 diabetes.

No one gives heed to our deadly fight because diabetes as a whole is linked to laziness and poor diet.

In the meantime, all of our non-type 1 friends will continue to make jokes about us shooting up drugs and having too much sugar as a kid. Many in the support community are cute about type 1. “Christmas is a time to be grateful” and “T1D looks like me”. I am not sure if censorship helps the cause. Trying to make others aware of this dangerous disease by dodging the real tragedy of it is what has stunted any real instigation of progress in the type 1 activism culture. Victims cower in the corner, unsure of how to convince the general public of the need for a cure.

The last fifteen years I resigned my unworthiness to type 1 diabetes, and couldn’t fathom the heroics of what I did by walking through the mountains to improve my life. I couldn’t fathom my own significance in educating people about the injustices we face everyday, and the urgency of this moment.

We are dying for a cure.  


share a story

Diabetes Rollercoaster

The Diabetes Rollercoaster

The Diabetes Rollercoaster

Yesterday I had a day that was one of many. A day where nothing seems to go right. Where I feel like I’m being defeated. Where I feel physically debilitated and mentally distraught. The days where I don’t feel like going through the motions. Where I feel victimized, more so than any other day.

Almost like diabetes is picking on me.

When even though I feel like I’m fighting my hardest, I have to find that extra bit of strength to fight even harder.

I had a day full of erratic and irregular blood sugars. From hyperglycemia to hypoglycemia. Blood sugars that wouldn’t go down due to insulin resistance, and blood sugars that would come down involuntarily hours later. This is what I like to call the “diabetes rollercoaster” effect.

This diabetes rollercoaster ride isn’t fun by any means. It’s rather exhausting and nauseating actually. It’s unlike normal amusements park coasters, where normally there is some excitement and then an end. However, this rollercoaster has no end and keeps on going. I’m not able to throw away my ticket and get off.

If it couldn’t get any worse, my moods shift constantly as well. The way I feel on the inside comes out unwillingly shows on the outside. I’m frustrated with myself as to why I can’t control this. Why does this disease have the ability to make me feel this way? I wish I could go a day without paying any mind to it. I could turn off all the alarms notifying me, do without thinking, and not feel this heavy burden on my shoulders.

I think what bothers me the most is that diabetes lets you think you have everything under control and then reminds you that you don’t. That even though I can do the same thing over and over again, I may not receive the same results.

I often wonder when will this end, when will I feel normal again? I’ve had diabetes for so long that all of this craziness is second nature to me now. Regardless, I just want off of this ride that I’m on. I want days where I’m not fighting for normalcy, that it’ll just come effortlessly.

When I think about how or why I’ve gotten on this diabetes rollercoaster ride. Having to endure all the highs and lows. That maybe this defeat is meant to push me and strengthen me to push forward. Knowing that the struggle that I’m in today shall pass. All I need to do is to surpass all these obstacles and hang on for dear life. Hopefully, then all of this will pay off one day I’ll be able to get off this crazy ride towards a long-awaited cure.

what living with diabetes feels like

What Living With Diabetes Feels Like

What Living With Diabetes Feels Like

Diabetes is often perceived as a self-inflicted disease. It’s assumed that someone brought it upon themselves by poor eating and lack of exercise. It’s commonly joked about and mocked in conversation with reference to body image and sugary foods.

With so many misconceptions and negative stereotypes, it causes this disease to be greatly overlooked. For those battling to often feel misunderstood and ashamed. From the outside looking in, it may seem that insulin is the solution—however it’s not, it’s my life support. That maybe if I change my diet all my problems will be solved—unfortunately that will not cure my diabetes.

To be honest, I had no idea that I would get sick one day and never get better. That my immune system would attack the insulin producing cells in my pancreas. An organ that I didn’t know existed prior to diagnosis or how important it actually is.

That I would have to work at this every day—whether I like it or not. By testing my blood sugar, taking insulin injections, and balancing what I eat.

Some would say “that seems tough” or “I could never do that“. But they don’t realize that I don’t have a choice.

If they only knew that diabetes is much more than “just” that. Diabetes is much more than what managing it looks like on the outside but how diabetes feels like on the inside. There’s a lot of emotion that goes into it. A lot of thinking, a lot of worrying, a lot of uncertainty, and sometimes a lot of chaos.

If only they really knew what living with diabetes feels like:

It’s that dry, fruity breath and taste in your mouth. Where nothing can quench your thirst.

The brain fog where you feel out of tune with your own body.

The pain or burning sensation when taking insulin to keep us alive. Constantly feeling like a pincushion.

Having scars left that mimic battle wounds. That are placed on the most insecure parts of your body.

The dazed, confused feeling of where am I and how did I get here. This disease not only alters your body but your mind.

The dependency of not only insulin, but medical equipment, devices, meters, and food when we get low.

Guilt that weighs heavy on us. That is carried from our day to day tasks, our mistakes, and wishing we didn’t have to learn the hard way.

Being extra cautionary towards injuries, infections, wounds, and always having paranoia. Our bodies taking longer to heal.

diabetes and the unexpected - diabetes blog week

The pressure builds from the responsibility on our plates. Having every intention to do good, but doesn’t always appear to work out that way.

Patiently waiting for the highs to come down or the lows to come up. How EVERYTHING affects our blood sugar.

The inevitable being present. This disease takes a toll on our bodies and we feel it. No matter how well in control we are.

The blurry vision and the lack of focus.

The anger that seeps through from the rollercoaster ride of blood sugars and emotions.

The tired feeling from doing this day in and day out for so long and trying to stay strong. With no days off and no vacation.

Having the feeling of everything being wrong but having the inability to put it into words exactly what that is.

I Want To Be Cured—Not Managed.

I can still live a long fulfilling life if I take care of myself to the best of my abilities. Knowing things could be much worse. I’m grateful for all the advances in technology and the everyday improvements being made in diabetes management.

But we still need and deserve more—we need freedom from Type 1 Diabetes. The burden to be lifted from our shoulders and our family members. Where we can sleep soundly, not have to deal with the highs and lows, or be dependent on insulin.

If more people knew more about this disease. How insulin is not a cure, how it is life threatening, and what living with diabetes feels like to those battling it every day. Then maybe—just maybe, they will want to help cure it too.



 

11 Type 1 Diabetic Misconceptions

11 Type 1 Diabetic Misconceptions

I’ve had Type One Diabetes for quite some time now – 14 years to be exact – and within those amount of years I’ve become fully aware of how misunderstood Type One Diabetes actually is. I’ve heard an endless amount of diabetic misconceptions. It’s hard living in a world where you’re placed in a category with Type Two Diabetes as well. Don’t get me wrong, we all fight a hard battle – but it’s each our own. It’s two completely different diseases in my eyes.

I’m here to set the record straight…

(11) Type 1 Diabetic Misconceptions:

1. “Did you get diabetes from eating sugar or gaining weight?”

Type One occurs when your body attacks the cells in the pancreas that produces insulin. There’s no specific rhyme or reason behind why this happens. It’s possible to occur due to genetics or environmental causes, but there is no significant proof to back these theories. But what I ate or my weight was definitely not the cause. This is on the top of the list of most common diabetic misconceptions.

2.”Should you be eating that?” 

Yes, I can eat that slice of cake! The myth that diabetics can’t have sugar needs to be thrown out the window right now! I can eat sweets in moderation, along with proper insulin management.

3.”Does using needles hurt?”

Of course, they hurt but I don’t have a choice in the matter. I don’t enjoy having to poke myself several times a day. But unfortunately, I have to in order to stay alive.

4.”My Grandma has diabetes”

Okay, stop right there. Yes, there are Type One Diabetics out there that are grandmothers, which I can totally relate to. But when you finish the sentence with “well she has Type Two” – “she manages with pills” – or “she just has to diet”,  let’s not compare.

5.”Shouldn’t you have this figured out by now?”

No, I wish diabetes was that easy. It’s like trying to figure out a Rubik’s cube every day, only for something to change, and have to start all over again. I can never perfect my diabetes. I constantly need to make adjustments, and all I can do is try to manage my diabetes to the best of my ability with proper diet, insulin, and exercise.

6.”Can you have kids?” “Will they get Diabetes?”

Yes, you can have children with diabetes. You’re considered at a higher risk, but with proper control before and during pregnancy, you’re less likely of complications. Statistics show the odds may be greater with your children getting Type One, but on the other hand, there’s plenty of Type One Diabetics (such as myself) where this diagnosis doesn’t run in the family. So who’s to really say?

7.My sugars low – “Does that mean you need insulin?”

Absolutely not! That would be life threatening in this situation. When my sugar is low I need the energy from food to be able to function normally.

8.”What’s your blood sugar?” “Is that good or bad?”

Honestly, I really can’t answer this one. I’m constantly aiming for a perfect blood sugar number. Trying to keep my blood sugar in a good range is like walking a tightrope, hoping not to fall. I live in a different normal of what’s “good or bad” with my blood sugars, compared to non-diabetics. I have to maintain a good control while being able to function every day.

9.”Let me give you some advice.”

Are you a Diabetic? Are you a physician? If not, just please stop! Just because you can talk the talk – doesn’t mean you can walk the walk.

10.”It could be worse.”

Of course, it could be. I’m thankful that I have a disease that can be managed and can still live a long life. But please don’t make light of the struggle that I go through. It’s not the best situation, but I’m making the best out of it.

11.”I heard there’s a cure.”

There is no cure, however, there continues to be research conducted in order to find a cure. Currently, there are future prospects, but all we can do right now is keep fighting and pray for a cure in the near future.

What’s are some diabetic misconceptions that you despise? Please share! ***