I Don’t Want To Feel Invisible With Type 1 Diabetes Anymore
From the moment I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes, my whole life changed. In more ways, than I could have ever imagined.
I had to start developing new habits, ways of thinking, and become stronger than I’ve ever thought imaginable. While the days continue to pass and change, so does my diabetes.
But the more I try to adapt to living with this disease, the more I realize that I have to adapt to the world around me. The world that is unaware or doesn’t understand Type 1 Diabetes.
I could walk in a room with a smile on my face, but deep down I could be struggling with my diabetes that day. No one would ever know unless I spoke openly about it. But even then most people wouldn’t pay much mind to it. I feel invisible with diabetes. While I’m present, this huge part of my life is not seen. It can’t be explained, understood, seen, or felt.
I’ve experienced and dealt with many life-threatening situations. It’s made me face reality and realize how fragile life is and how easily it can be taken away. I can’t run, hide, or neglect it. It’ll always catch up to me.
There’s no perfection with this disease. It’s just a human fighting to survive every day and continuing to beat the odds. While diabetes is constant, the variables presented every day is not.
Diabetes is like Einstein’s insanity quote about expecting different results. But instead, diabetes is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting the same results.
I hear “if you change your diet, exercise, or lose weight your diabetes will be in better control”. With all good intentions put forth, Type 1 Diabetes is complex and can not be simplified. It’s forever.
“At least your alive and it’s not cancer”. “If you eat so and so I hear it will help your disease”. “There’s a cure out there for it”.
Instead of finding some compassion and empathy, there’s judgement and scrutiny. For a disease that I never asked for. One that leaves me in tears, where I beg on certain days for things to go right, where I don’t have to think so much and fear the unknown.
I don’t want to feel invisible with Type 1 Diabetes anymore.
I want others to understand how complicated Type 1 Diabetes truly is. That as manageable it can be, it’s just as deadly. Insulin is not a cure, and it only keeps us alive until there is a cure. That we need everyone’s help and support in finding a cure.