Category: Marriage

It’s Not You, It’s Diabetes

“It’s not you, it’s diabetes”
By: Mitchell Jacobs

“BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP” Will you fix your sugar already it’s 2 in the morning and I have to be up in 3 hours! This is almost a nightly event with my wife of four years. She’s a type one diabetic. Which in short means her pancreas failed at a young age.

So why is this such a big problem in our day to day lives? The constant beeping, the constant snacking, and the never ending high alarms and the dreaded low alarms. My wife sets her CGM to go off below 70 and above 200. That doesn’t leave much room for a quiet night, or after noon or anytime for that matter. However, we would rather be alert of her situation than unaware and not treat a severe high or low.

I work anywhere from 45-55 hours a week, on a military schedule mind you, which could mean showing up for work Wednesday and being told I’m leaving for a detachment Friday.

I can’t begin to tell you how many times i’ve been in a room at work with co workers to hear her low alarm go off. (If you’ve heard an amber alert go off on you’re phone its as startling as that.) So it scares my coworkers and definitely scares me. Now I need to go out of the building (no reception) and make a phone call to ensure my wife is aware of her low, and treating it. This is just the beginning of my frustration with her type one diabetes.

A large part of my job in the military is flying. I’m not a pilot but I’m known as a Naval Aircrewman. So we could have 6 – 7 hour flights from one side of the country to the next. Or even more worrisome is when we travel oversees. Then I cannot get cellular data (thanks a lot Verizon), until I connect to wifi in the hotel we’ll stay in.

I can’t begin to stress to you how deep your heart can sink when you get a low alert at 8am local time but 2am where my wife is, and I can’t get through with her. It’s the simplest thing, to make a phone call, until hearing that voice is the only thing that stops the panic.

 
More than frustrating, Type one is scary. I’ve seen the horror stories of the husbands who left for work, hadn’t heard from their wife all day, to find her that night unconscious. I find the bulk of the frustration I feel towards my wife (other than her managing to wash her hands in a sink that we collectively removed the garbage disposal from [*inside joke*]) is type one diabetes. I constantly find myself desiring to apologize to her for how angry or annoyed I got with her, based on something she has little control over.

If I could say anything to my wife right now, it’s I love you. Plain and simple, and I know what I signed up for. I don’t mean to always seem frustrated with you because I want you to be healthy, and I’m glad you set your alarms for such good numbers. I just want you to know its not you, it’s diabetes.


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My Husband and I Both Have Diabetes: A Partner in Life Who "Gets It"

My Husband and I Both Have Diabetes: A Partner in Life Who “Gets It”

My Husband and I Both Have Diabetes: A Partner in Life Who “Gets It”

By: Laura Bobik

I was diagnosed at the tough age of 14 –

And I always felt isolated and alone in dealing with my diabetes because we all know that you don’t “know” diabetes unless you live with it. I didn’t know anyone who had diabetes, but I knew it wasn’t going to define me! I wanted to live a normal life and never stand out as different than my peers.

The desire to always be treated “normal” drove me to feel a lot of shame. Where I felt like I needed to completely deal with my diabetes in private. I’d never check my blood sugar in front of anyone, shots were only given behind closed doors, the juice boxes that I carried everywhere with me we “for when I was thirsty”, and when my sugars were so low that I had to tell someone I felt embarrassed. I hated living with diabetes.

When I was 28 I met my future husband on a dating website. As I read through his profile and found that he was also a type 1 diabetic, I wanted to close his profile and move on. We’d be a total freak show if we both were carrying juice boxes everywhere and taking injections together in restaurants! Something made me write him, and we met and fell head over heels in love.

There are and were so many things I love about him –

But the connection we instantly had because we just “got” each other was amazingly refreshing. It was something I didn’t even know how much I needed. Having Chad by my side has allowed me to fully embrace my diabetes and to be proud of the person it has formed me into.

It’s allowed me not to worry what others may think when I’m profusely sweating and my hands are shaking while I treat a low. Not to feel badly when I feel awful and grumpy from a high. And it’s given me a real sense of peace knowing that if I was ever to be in a dangerous situation, he would know how to care for me better than anyone else.

Together, we hear our blood sugars and take/give injections and I honestly don’t care who sees or what they think! I’m thankful to have my partner in life be someone who is also my partner in this small Type 1 Diabetes community we’re both a part of. God knew what he was doing when he crossed our paths and I’m so thankful that he did.

Find someone (it doesn’t have to be a spouse) who you can tackle every day with. There’s strength and courage found in numbers and we all know the importance of both strength and courage in diabetes.



 

My Journey With a Type 1 Diabetic

My Journey With a Type 1 Diabetic

My Journey With a Type 1 Diabetic

Written by: Mitchell Jacobs

I remember the first time I met Brittany, it was like yesterday. She was this cute, bubbly, giggly girl. But mostly what I remember is how beautiful I thought she was. We began dating when I was only 19, I was fresh out of high school without a clue of what the world was or even what diabetes was.

All I knew was my pickup truck, my dog Petey and this girl I couldn’t stop thinking about. Then one day I was with her and she introduced me to this disease I had never been familiar with. Known as Type 1 Diabetes. We were out to lunch like any couple would be and Brittany began to explain to me the details of her disease. I didn’t know anything, and at the time it didn’t really phase me much either.

As months passed we moved in together. This is when I really started to see how ugly of a disease Type 1 Diabetes really is. Her family had recently dropped her from the insurance and Brittany and I began to feel the repercussions of it, barely being able to afford food, let alone insulin.

I began to see Brittany’s blood sugars crashing to lows so severe that she would become unconscious. I was having to wrestle with my girlfriend going from normal to extremely combative to unconscious, and having to call 911, all within an hour. I was flabbergasted by this disease. “What in the HELL was going on!” Why is her blood sugar so wacky and why can’t we figure this out?”

I remember becoming so involved in trying to figure this disease out and be as supportive as I possibly could. One day she had an appointment at the endocrinologist’s office, and I stayed up the whole night thinking about questions to ask this Doctor, so I could write them down in a notebook. I needed to know how to fix this disease. “it’s simple” I thought, the blood sugars are numbers, carbs are numbers; “there has to be an answer to this equation.” I was wrong. I soon realized how complex diabetes was and that I couldn’t fix “it”. I couldn’t do anything but be her rock.

We continued to live our life from hospital visit to hospital visit, DKA, and many close calls. We were trying to be 20 something-year-olds, going out having a good time and trying but barely managing this disease. In all honesty, I noticed times through our past that we tried to ignore the fact the Brittany wasn’t a “normal” girl. We would go out and be irresponsible while trying to ignore this MONSTER. When I finally realized that I was going to have to really step up for Brittany was when I had recently turned 22, Brittany and I went out for a few drinks at a local restaurant.

We went home and the next morning Brittany woke up to take her insulin. Which at the time she was taking a long lasting insulin while supplementing with a short acting insulin. Well, she took the short acting insulin on accident and I woke up to find her walking through the house. Pale white, sweating profusely, and incoherent. I immediately knew her blood sugar was low. Coffee was brewing, and the sugar was sitting out with a teaspoon already in the tupperware.

So I grabbed the teaspoon and coerced Brittany into taking the spoonful of sugar. This is when her grand mal seizure began. She clenched her teeth, her eyes rolled to the back of her head, and I grabbed her as she began to collapse, screaming for my mother nearby to come help and call the police. The minutes felt like hours waiting for the EMTs to arrive on the scene.

I can only remember crying this hard as a child. “What have I done, what am I doing to this girl?” I felt like I wasn’t doing the best that I could do. I became well aware of how fragile her life is every single day. Yet, she embodies such perseverance and courage that I’ve never seen before. I began to think about diabetes constantly and how I can help Brittany live a long life.

This is the person I want to spend my entire life with, and I better figure out how to keep her around. Shortly after this incident, I left for Naval boot camp, Brittany became my wife, the mother of my children and was able to get health insurance. She now has the best health care and products to assist her in managing this disease.

However, the battle may be easier, we have not won. I have been blessed with this woman. Whom I am so proud of for how far she’s come and for showing me not only her weaknesses but her inevitable strength. She has been the best thing that has ever happened to me. Thanks to her I am the man, the husband, and the father that I am. This journey has been paved with failures and victories but, it’s only the first chapter of my life with a Type 1 Diabetic.

When I vowed.. in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.. I meant it.